i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
ok first of all what the fuck
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