Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
