pedialite and red bull = repair kit
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
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