he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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