somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
ok first of all what the fuck
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
