I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst