I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
