I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
