I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize