He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize