I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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