Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
