she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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