areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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