and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize