after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
