I'm really into asian looking animals
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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