Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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