so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
