let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
