Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
