I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
