So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
