grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
