Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
