Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
tell me about the eggs
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize