YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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