i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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