I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.