haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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