anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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