explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
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