My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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