i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
