the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm way too hungover for life right now
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
