I showed him my bush... on skype.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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