people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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