im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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