She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Randomize