It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.