Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
