then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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