After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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