very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
