He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Terrible idea I love it
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize