kristin has been a bad kristin
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
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