i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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