I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
