i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize