dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
